Akanksha http://hopeinadarkworld.com Through the Soul . . . To my Calm Wed, 21 Feb 2018 16:38:06 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.9.4 138017067 WHAT AM I THEN? http://hopeinadarkworld.com/what-am-i-then/ http://hopeinadarkworld.com/what-am-i-then/#comments Sat, 17 Feb 2018 16:15:46 +0000 http://hopeinadarkworld.com/?p=4236
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A body well taken cared of,

A heart, cold and desolate

A mind with wrangling thoughts,

A soul dying in despair.

Shoulders low tonight, lips mumbling,

‘I create problems for everyone,

No one is happy with me’,

A silent tear escaping his eyes, not mine to keep.

My heart demanding to embrace him,

My arms afraid to break the ‘conscious’ spell,

My words, hidden in the abyss of my musing,

A strange low voice combating his self-knit facts.

“What am I then?” said the Broken optimism,

seeking warmth and secret homage,

Quantifying the depth of the anchored emotions,

The soft corners for him were yet to fade.

The ‘Who’ had been replaced with the ‘What’ unnoticed,

The worth of life, not known to the blind self

I, silently rooted to my closed world

Your presence in my mind, Couldn’t say it back then,

‘You are good,

I don’t care even if you’re not,

You laugh at rare things,

Just the way you cry at them too

You attach yourself to none.

You care for a few teary eyes filled with pain,

You got that swelled up nerve on your forehead,

The frown lines showing the glimpse of all the stress.

You are like every other adrift being,

Who is too tired to look for a meaning,

Who is becoming the negative ideas of his essence

The one who is yet to find the peace.

You, my beautiful being, are a life,

A life, only you are born to live.

 

 

 

 

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Real Women Do Not Get Raped http://hopeinadarkworld.com/real-women-do-not-get-raped/ http://hopeinadarkworld.com/real-women-do-not-get-raped/#comments Fri, 02 Feb 2018 17:55:57 +0000 http://hopeinadarkworld.com/real-woman-do-not-get-raped/

‘Real Men Don’t Rape’

I am tired of reading and listening these certain words. I mean what does it mean? If we believe in these words then probably these wordings would be correct too ‘Real Women Do Not Get Raped’. Am i right?

If my getting raped labels me to be filthy and unfit for being a woman, then I am fine with it. It’s my body, it’s my life, it’s my choices and it’s entirely my pain. Rape doesn’t change my vagina into a penis. So why am I not fit for being a woman?

It wasn’t my mistake when my home, my supposed to be safe place is the one where I was robbed off my being. Isn’t it your mistake, the ones who taught me the difference between right and wrong, the difference between a salwaar kameez and shorts, to never have told me that being Home doesn’t mean I am safe, that the ones I believed would protect me are the ones who could kill me too.

You know what I believe?

‘Men Don’t Rape Woman’ these days. The little innocent souls are their new favourites. Am I too rude? Pardon me if I am.

I was born and brought up in a society which taught me my limits before they taught me to dream and achieve, a society which built this image of me before they even let me breathe.

I am a woman. . .

A tired woman of this hungry, ashen heart society. I am tired of being the object of your imagination. Please forgive me, I am just a tiny peculiar piece of body. You the lord, shouldn’t bother to give a second glance or a thought of me.

If my being a woman sends an erotic shiver down your body, then I wouldn’t grow up to become one. But, I would still without doubt become the flesh you would be served for your hunger seems to be blind to my age. For the younger I am, the smaller my vagina and more your pleasure. Isn’t it? It all sums up to your pleasure.

I am an 8 months old girl. I am your sister. I am waiting to tie Rakhi on your wrist for you are the one who would protect me.

Curtain falls. . .  Lights switched on. . .

You are the one who Raped me.

Why?

I have no breast that I am showing off a little to much. I do not go out at nights so I am not labelling myself as available. I am not drinking out with male guys so I am not a whore.

Then why?

Enough! I am tired. I’ll just let it be now.

I would no more be careful of what I wear or of the timings, or of giving a wrong idea to you by hanging out with my fellow male friends.

For if they want to rape me, they would rape me in a salwaar kameez, in broad day light, inside my home. So if I am going to be raped anyway, then why live such a suffocating life. . .

#_Let_it_be #_raw

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THE END IS THE BEGINNING TOO http://hopeinadarkworld.com/the-end-is-the-beginning-too/ http://hopeinadarkworld.com/the-end-is-the-beginning-too/#comments Sun, 14 Jan 2018 09:20:52 +0000 http://hopeinadarkworld.com/?p=4210
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You walk down the path,

Trying to get to a particular point,

Which in your mind or whatsoever,

Is the place for you that is destined.

An ‘only yours’ journey,

And a life with obstacles at your prime,

Wrestling with the harsh world,

With failed attempts to truly be fine.

One. . .

Two . . .

Three. . .

Thirty-six. . .

A hundred and seven. . .

You took the strikes of the sharp knife,

Famously called struggle or a second name to life,

And then one day it hit you,

It hit you hard killing you to demise,

Taking away with it, everything,

Everything in you that wanted to breathe and survive.

You have now reached a dead end,

Laying ashen-faced in the dark ravine.

Staring calmly at the wall in front of you,

With no path ahead for you to stride.

One day passes, then two, then three,

A month goes by and you haven’t smiled,

Out of the blue one day, you blink,

You get up and out of the coma, you are alive.

You walk ahead and the wall hits you,

The dead-end standing strongly holding its poise,

You smile, you turn around,

You walk back the path you had hiked.

For if the path ends,

If your journey brings you to a dead end,

There’s nothing to worry,

The end can always be used as a beginning too.

 

 

 

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THE DOOR WASN’T LOCKED http://hopeinadarkworld.com/the-door-wasnt-locked/ http://hopeinadarkworld.com/the-door-wasnt-locked/#comments Fri, 12 Jan 2018 14:36:31 +0000 http://hopeinadarkworld.com/?p=4200
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I knew he was there,

Somewhere in the dark waiting for me,

With its intention to slaughter me inch by inch,

To unlock the door I had so cautiously sealed.

I, with these locked doors

Layed silently yet not peacefully

My heart thumping inside of me

Alerting me to all the menace and possibilities.

The night came, finally

Giving it the fair chance, it so eagerly fancied,

The door was unlocked,

I, unaware of my amnesia,

Layed unguardedly to the fiend.

Morning came and so did hit the realization,

The fear of the What If’s

After all, I was not yet savored  like dead meat,

What if He had tried opening the unlocked door?

The one that last night wasn’t so secure;

What if he had been on the hunt?

Its predating senses giving it everything.

What if he hadn’t yet given up?

Trying and failing every night to reach its prey.

For the door that led to its hunger,

Yes, the one that led to its liberation wasn’t unlocked.

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CRAVING FOR YOUR TOUCH http://hopeinadarkworld.com/craving-for-your-touch/ http://hopeinadarkworld.com/craving-for-your-touch/#comments Tue, 26 Dec 2017 17:07:45 +0000 http://hopeinadarkworld.com/?p=4192
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Proclivity
It wouldn’t be true if I said,

‘I do not want to feel you close again’

For my eyes manifest the truth,

Clearly your touch, I fail to abstain.

The profuse libido obscure to the world,

Is never really off display for you to savor;

Trying to fly to my life, to my good,

I lay here rooted to your abject love.

I’m silent,

I’m screaming,

I’m shouting,

I’m running,

I’m aching,

I am craving. . .

Craving for your touch,

Craving to feel your intense gaze on me,

To feel your lips on mine,

To let our voices be the rhymes,

To brush my hands on your body belonging to me at the time.

I crave to breathe in your aroma,

To let me be packed with the scent of you,

I close my eyes for I’ve had enough,

Of these views, the flashbacks of me and you.

I ache for your touch,

For the lingering feeling of you so much.

I crave for you

For it’s the only thing that brings to me, you.

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A LIFE WITHIN ME http://hopeinadarkworld.com/a-life-within-me/ http://hopeinadarkworld.com/a-life-within-me/#comments Mon, 18 Dec 2017 16:36:24 +0000 http://hopeinadarkworld.com/?p=4187
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‘You fight your toughest battles alone’,

Should that be termed as a curse or a boon?

I fought mine too,

Not a battle precisely but a condition surely fraught;

Where I looked at the road they had taken,

With silence as their response to my throbbing call.

Yet it wasn’t me alone. . .

A hurricane of worry destroying my world,

A concealed warmth calming my nerves

And a shared future that awaited me at the other end.

I, who ceased to move

I, who had not yet cried to let loose

I, who was freaked out with its mere presence

Now felt the love it brought to the body I call my home.

A faint smile as I see her laughing to my tickling,

Her tiny fingers wrapped tightly around my index finger,

Her tiny legs jumping, to show the big girl who walks like her mommy,

Her tender lips kissing my tears goodbye,

Her bicycle lessons just like I got mine from my mother,

Her future, nothing that I wanted mine like to be,

But everything she would want, hers to be.

This warmth. . .

This warmth I feel,

A faint smile and she’s mine to keep.

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BOOKS N BREW, THE BLISS http://hopeinadarkworld.com/books-n-brew-the-bliss/ Sun, 17 Dec 2017 18:42:24 +0000 http://hopeinadarkworld.com/?p=4181

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Bliss
Chandigarh is pretty famous for its fun and hang-out places. Personally, I haven’t been to many such places. I am not much of a hang-out person I suppose. But there’s this one place I fell in love with the moment I stepped inside and would strongly recommend to all of you to visit at least once during your stay at the City Beautiful.

A book and a cup of coffee or let us say A book and food, that’s probably everything a Bookaholic needs to survive. BOOKS AND BREW, Sector 16, Chandigarh has the perfect ambience for any person who loves these two. Just grab a book & some food, take a seat and enjoy the bliss.

The interiors are beautiful. The woodwork, the paintings, oh! the dreamcatchers (love them the most), the ceiling has this wooden chick blind texture which gives the place an awe-inspiring look. Just totally love the place <3

Oh, by the way, did I tell you the place has this amazing bunker bed kind of seating. So you can basically climb up, away from the crowd and enjoy your time. Isn’t that amazing? If you have a beautiful company, the experience becomes even better <3

And if you are with your friends and want to have some good time, the food here is really good and you can also play games like Chess, Ludo etc. This place gives you comfort and belonging there kinda feeling.Yeah, It gave me these amazing vibes 😀

I had wanted to write about this place for some time now, but never really did.

By the way, Did I tell you that I could have literally lived there? 😛 😉

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I AM NOT ASKING FOR MORE http://hopeinadarkworld.com/i-am-not-asking-you-for-more/ http://hopeinadarkworld.com/i-am-not-asking-you-for-more/#comments Fri, 15 Dec 2017 17:42:51 +0000 http://hopeinadarkworld.com/?p=4169
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Meager
My yearning for more is silenced,

as I lay next to you but far from your heat,

My subconscious constantly telling me that it’s time to leave,

While my body has still not had enough of you to take away with me.

My eyes that are trying to devour you as much as it could,

For I who just had you as hers a few moments ago,

Lay with naked vulnerabilities next to you asking for more,

More, that isn’t said or existing between us for sure.

A little more would be enough maybe,

Maybe just a small hold as I lay next to you,

Maybe just don’t let everything in you but words demand my scoot,

Or maybe, just a little glance at me as I die in this bitter anxiety.

I looked at you, ‘I have to leave. I want more’, there I said it,

With you looking at me as something so meager,

‘I am not asking you for more’, my final words,

Your silence clearly revealing my ultimatum.

 

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I AM THE LEGACY HE LEFT BEHIND FOR HER http://hopeinadarkworld.com/i-am-the-legacy-he-left-behind-for-her/ http://hopeinadarkworld.com/i-am-the-legacy-he-left-behind-for-her/#comments Wed, 13 Dec 2017 18:18:15 +0000 http://hopeinadarkworld.com/?p=4155
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Inheritance
What was it that he left behind for her?

An easy life ahead?

Or probably beautiful memories of their moments together?

Alas! He would have left her a garden full of beauty and dreams.

Or maybe, just maybe, the world where his fortress was built.

But no,

He left for her not even words to soothe her soul,

It’s just me,

I am the legacy he left behind for her,

I am what reminded her constantly of everything she doesn’t hold,

But reminded her more of what she now owned,

A broken marriage,

Ghastly memories,

Battles to survive in this barbarous world,

Words that were only uttered to catcall,

A burden as they said, of two lives now,

A smudge of the relationships and the duties she failed.

She was an angel who survived in hell,

The one who hadn’t become what was offered back to her.

A legacy is the most precious thing, isn’t it?

That is what I became for her.

The only family to her,

The only innocence left in the world that’s brutal

She made me this well filled with her love,

She made me everything that is deemed to be precious.

Made me her laugh,

Made me her tear,

Made me her bedtime stories,

Made me her pillow to cry on,

She gave me the most special gift,

For she made me hers.

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THE UNWORLDLY SOUL http://hopeinadarkworld.com/the-unworldly-soul/ http://hopeinadarkworld.com/the-unworldly-soul/#comments Thu, 07 Dec 2017 12:09:33 +0000 http://hopeinadarkworld.com/?p=4138
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Saintly
Childlike innocence,

Eyes all brightened up with exemplary shine,

A heart filled with nothing but love,

Oh! That laughter is so divine.

Curiosity at its level best,

Questions about anything and everything do they catechize,

They wear their heart on their sleeves truly,

Giving warmth to the world so frosty and hostile.

Life, their garden of Eden

Them, being the Prince and Princess of this paradise

The hands that touch not body but soul,

The Lips that utter only raw thoughts.

They look for the good in everything,

Their souls so pure and angel-like,

No walls but The world, their ally,

No wars but the goodwill their bowie knife.

Grown up to a whole new being,

Becoming more of the frigid earthling,

Holding us to the faith and Hope,

The memories of our childhood will suffice.

 

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